Is Oral Sex acceptable within the perimeters of Marriage?

I just spotted your retired, wrinkled eyes peeking through your Forty Two (42) years of marriage and wondering what glory have you missed or what obscurity is this neonatal Child of God bringing to the table.

But not to worry, you can either learn through my writings or you may scrutinize based on your own perception, conception or just merely your conviction. So let’s firstly look at marriage. Marriage in its biblical sense is the union of man and woman as husband and wife, or, abstractly the union or relationship viewed as an institution. Marriage was divinely instituted in the Garden of Eden in the form of monogamy which we would clearly see in Genesis 2:24, “Therefore a man should leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife and they shall become one flesh.” Noah also could be described as the second founder of the race, had only one wife as it is explained in Genesis 7:7, “So Noah, with his sons, his wife and his son’s wives went into the ark because of the waters of the flood.”

The new testament also approves only monogamy as explained in Matthew 19:3-9. So then we clearly see that the birthright design of a marriage is man and woman solely monogamy and not polygamy. Now let us look closely at sex. In the Noun context Sex maybe defined as sexual activity including sexual intercourse. Also let’s view oral sex. Oral sex is the sexual activity in which the genitals of one partner are stimulated by mouth of the other.

Now that we have looked closely at those subjects by definition lets look at what the bible says about it all. While the bible does not specifically address either question, there are definitely biblical principles that apply. So we may ask the question, “Is Oral Sex a sin?” Let us look at what Hebrew 13:4 states, “Marriage is honourable in all and the bed undefiled; but whoremongers and adulterers God will judge.” Because marriage is honourable unto God and the bed remains undefiled, any sexual activity that involves ONLY

the wife and husband is acceptable by God. We must remember that Sex was designed solely for married couples. Because of the guidelines that were laid out, we should be confident as to how far we go in our sexual pleasures for example, in Thessalonians 4:3-5 it states that adultery is sin. What is adultery we may ask? Adultery is the willful violation of the marriage contract by either of the parties, through sexual intercourse with third parties. It was forbidden by the seventh commandment. With this being said, we see therefore that the sexual pleasures of threesome, engaging a third person or other parties are forbidden by God hence this kind of sexual act defiles the bed.

Oral sex is a type of sex that may very well be between wife and husband. Sex outside of marriage are looked at as fornication, which fornication is said to be a sin. Non-married couples are not to practice such a act because since the time of Adam and Eve, God made sex to be a beautiful expression of love for married couples.

In order to properly analyze your sex life to judge if its in alignment with the guidelines of God, you may ask yourself these several questions:

Is there mutual consent?

As it states in 1 Corinthians 7:5, ” Do not deprive one another except with consent for a time, that you may give yourselves to fasting and prayer; and come together again so that satan does not tempt you because of your lack of self control.” This shows the importance of mutual consent in any decision that may or may not affect your sexual relationship with your husband or your wife.

Is adultery a sin?

1 Thessalonians 4: 3-5 states, “For this reason, when i could no longer endure it, i sent to know your faith, lest by some means the tempter had tempted you and our labour might be in vain.”

Is viewing Pornography, a sin?

Matthews 5: 28 states, ” But i say to you that whoever looks at a woman to lust for her has already committed adultery with her in his heart.” So we see here that viewing pornography and being aroused by such sight of the woman or man in the act, we become lustful and sin in our hearts and by sight.

Why do you want oral sex, is it to fulfill a pornography fantasy or for just pure sexual pleasures?

1 John 2: 16 states, ” For all that is in the world the lust of the flesh, the lust of the eyes, and the pride of life is not of the Father but is of the world.”

Are you convicted by it that it is wrong?

John 16:8 states, “And when he is come, he will reprove the world of sin, and of righteousness, and of judgement.”

To help us to better understand what the conviction of sin is, we may look at what it is or may not be. The first important thing we must know is that conviction of sin is not a guilty heart or even shameful face of what sinful act there may. Such feelings are commonly experienced by almost if not everyone. However, this is not true conviction of sin. The second thing to look at is, conviction of sin is not a sense of trepidation or foreboding of divine punishment. It is never being fearful or anxious of any act of sin. These feelings are also generally experienced in the hearts and mind of sinners. True conviction of sin is something absolutely different. The word convict is translated in the greek word elencho, which means, “To convince someone of the truth; To reprove; To acuse; To refute; or cross examined a witness.”

What the holy spirit does is to act as a prosecuting attorney who reveals evil, reproves evil-doers and convinces people that they need a saviour. To be convicted simply is to feel the sheer loathsomeness of sin. This comes about when we have seen God’s purity, holiness, his beauty and also when we recognize that sin cannot dwell with him, Like what Psalms 5:4 and Isaiah 6:5 explained about his sinless character. So let us understand the true meaning of conviction before we even answer those guideline questions. Because on many occasions we have a tendency to confuse guilt and shame for conviction and it is not so.

So what is God saying to you, are you sinning to please your husband or wife by orally edifying him or her?

Or are you in one accordance with God’s words and his guidelines when you orally pleases your husband or your wife?

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Why have thee thrown thy balls sloppily in thy closet???

Romans 2:26-32

For this cause God gave them up unto vile affections:

For even their women did change the natural use into that which is against nature: And likewise also the men, leaving the natural use of the woman, burnt in their lust one towards another; men with men working that which is unseemingly and receiving in themselves that recompence of their error which was meet.

And even as they did not like to retain God in their knowledge, God gave them over to a reprobate mind to do those things which are not convenient; Being filled with all unrighteousness, fornication, wickedness, covetousness, maliciousness, full of envy, murder, debate, deceit, malignity, whisperers, backbiters, haters of God, despiteful, proud, boasters, inventors of evil things, disobedient to parents, without understanding, covenant breakers, without natural affection, implacable, unmerciful:

Who knowing the judgement of God, that they which commit such things are worthy of death, not only do the same, but have pleasure in them that do them.

As it is laid out in that scripture we understand that God have established his standards and there are sins and then there are SINS.

Homosexuality is one of those sins that falls under sexual immorality. Paul argued that homosexual sin is serious and as such the unrepentant, active homo sinners will by no means enter the Kingdom of God. Paul also encouraged his readers not to be deceived by fake teachings and perverse knowledge. He declared there will be those whom deny this truth and argue that some forms of homosexual livity are ok and should be acceptable by society and by God. However, Paul was very precised in his arguments. He said homosexuality leads people to damnation and destruction. It is not a unique sin, nothing about it is indifferent or extraordinary. It is a sin like any other as Paul explained. His list included several forms of sexual immorality and adultery. It also includes non sexual types of sins, such as: Drunkenness, theft, unforgiveness etc. Tho homosexuality sin is incredibly serious but it is not the only serious sin, all sins are indeed serious and have their own consequencies and outcomes. All sins open many doors of strong-holds in your life, such as: Physical and spiritual death, misery, bitterness, jealousy, mental illnesses, rejection, S.T.I.’s, infidelity, addiction and the list could go on forever. Apart of societal issues is that we tend to trivialized other socalled small sins such as: Greed, drunkenness, reviling, and defrauding others but when the topic is about homosexuality and adultery, a time bomb goes off in our heads and we instantly downgrade some and upgrade the others in relation to severity. We have placed this enormous amount of energy, judgement and condemnation on ones we perceived to be great and serious sins.

But could it be because our mind is carnal or very small, we tend to capitalized on things our mind apparently can’t handle? All sins are sins and none is greater than the other. God is such an amazing God, that his mind is supreme, and it envelopes that which we couldn’t even bare to understand.

God forgives and he loves us and accepts us and see’s us beyond our flaws. Like Paul said and such were some of you. You were washed, sanctified, you were justified in the name of the Lord Jesus Christ and by the Spirit of God. This brought me back to a few years back. I was working at a Supermarket in New York City, just a little off Flatbush Avenue and there I met this girl with thick, strong, black locs, with eyes of darkness written within them, her attirement suggested it all but I am unworthy to judge another’s character or their lives. We became friends and I decided I would make a difference. The day came where we exchanged numbers but it turnt out the first phone call was the last.

At that point i’ve realized some can’t be helped in up close in person because some can only be helped by intercessory prayers.

So i had discovered that my sole purpose at that moment was to intercede on her behalf. I prayed for her couple times per week. Then there it was, she whispered to me, “I like you, you are sexy?”

I immediately gasped for air because i have never seen or heard a woman spoke with such confusion. I bowed my head in shame before her because of how the moment felt to me. If I could have disappeared at that moment I would have felt alive. Then I thought to myself, she must be so hurt inside to the point she could not feel ashamed as I were, what went so wrong in her life? So I looked at her and said, “You know, God really loves you, when everybody have turned their backs on you, God is holding you.”

“Your destiny is not to be a woman’s wife. God is going to place you at a Church and there you will find your husband and there you will experience a wonderful union.”

As I said that, she laughed hysterically, I felt like such a clown or a bombarded fool wondering what have I said that deserves such laughter. All I could have said to her was, “I’m sorry but I cannot be your go to friend but I am your friend that will be praying for you.” She laughed me to scourne and may I tell you, about two (2) years after, I was on a famous social media site browsing and she messaged me. When I viewed the message, I had to double check the display picture. It wasn’t her, I met someone new online. This girl had no locs that emphasized the many years of pain. She wasn’t wearing any dusty gothic make-up neither was she wearing any pitch black ghost like killer pants and her skin wasn’t like death. This girl called herself FAITH. Her hair was of a classy bunned style, her dress was such a flary heavenly appearance with eyes of newness. I was indeed shocked. This girl have changed. This girl have became sanctified. This girl got married, she was so beautiful it made me cried. Prayers do come true. There was absolutely a difference, her annointing possessed change. She said, ” Phoebe, thank you. You prayed for me, you are my sister in Christ.”

May I tell you, even when I had backslided, she was stronger than a rock and still is, going hardcore in her ministries and demonstrating her annointing. She thought it was my prayer that made God heard her cries and delivered her but she have no idea what her existence and sin have done for me. If it weren’t for her sin, I would not have had this drive and passion for prayer. That was my first encounter with the powers of prayer. I strongly believe that prayers can move mountains and calm storms. Anyone can be forgiven as long as you are willing to change and turn from your evil ways. Your sins are not too big or contrary for God to forgive and accepts you.

If you are reading this and you know this story is a reflection of your life and you are convicted by it and you feel ashamed, fearful, guilty, filthy…….STOP!

Don’t feel guilty, don’t feel ashamed, don’t feel unaccepted, or fearful because God will still hear you and answer you if you would just repent with a broken and contrite heart. God will forgive all your sins and give you a new life once you are determined to turn a blind eye to the old you. You are now dead to sin and alive in Christ. Go fort and testify of God’s mighty works. Keep not thy balls in the closet because your closet is filled with corpse and scorpion waiting to repaint your room in death. Throw out your skeletons, gather your balls and allow God to clean thy closet by tarring your mind with a fresh annointing.

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Predestination and Salvation, are we predestined by God?

So as I dived head way in this research, the intensity got me aroused that I could not stop reading and pulling scriptures and to add to that I had to make my way to Bible Studies so that my findings maybe confirmed.  So here goes…..dang! Dang! Dang!

Let’s look at the word Pre, Destination and Predestination firstly.   Pre means before; Destination means the place to which someone or something is going or being sent and Predestination in Christian theology means the doctrine that God had ordained all that will happen, especially with regards to the salvation of some and not all of humankind.

Now, which doctrine does this applies to or which theologian believed such a thing as this?

These teachings have been associated with the teachings of St. Augustine of Hippo and that of the famous, well talked about Calvin.  Who was Calvin?

John Calvin was a French theologian  born July 10th, 1509 in a city called Noyon, France, who died at the age of 55 in the city of Geneva, France.   A Catholic in his younger years who divorced those believes for what he believed to be a predestined one.  He then created what is called Calvinism, Calvinistic doctrine, which teaches that God predestined us.

Calvin went ahead, and created a 5 points umbrella in order for us to remember what Calvinism fosters.  This is laid out by the acrostic TULIP, which means:

T- Total Depravity (also could be looked at as total inability because of Romans 5: 12; without the power of the Holy Spirit, the natural man is blinded and deaf to the message of the gospel.)

U- Unconditional Election ( this speaks to the selection process, meaning God chose those whom he was pleased to bring to a knowledge of himself, not based on merit shown by God’s Grace and not by whom he discovered to accept him and his gospel but solely upon the counsel of God’s will, some for glory and some for damnation.)

L-Limited Atonement (meaning Christmas did not die for all but he died for the born again Christians, for the elected, predestined ones who are in right standing with God.

Irresistible Grace- (Men come to Christ when the Lord calls them John 6:44)

P-Perseverance  of the Saints ( This means, only the elected, predestined ones will remain in God’s hands and never to be plucked out and cannot fail only them will persevere)


Oh boy and it just got even more dramatic.  It’s like a story of an horror movie, lol.  Can you imagine living a doubtful life?  I mean If this were true, i would be scared not knowing if I was predestined for hell and it doesn’t matter what I do or how I live, whether or not my life is right or I’m the most sinful person on earth, I would be super tired wondering daily, omg did God predestined me for Heaven or wait, am I going to hell? Wooooow! That sounds too much like an arbitrary God right? No…..that’s not the all powerful, all merciful, all supernatural God that I know.  The God I know wants us to solely trust in him and feed off his words and believe that whatever he promised us will be fulfilled because he said so.  John 3:16 states, For God so loved the world he gave his only begotten Son that whosoever believes in him will not perish but have everlasting life.   This scripture speaks to the sovereignty of God, it speaks to his desire for us to freely choose him, the desire for us to believe that he is God and he is confident in his capability to perform mighty works and does not need to force or perform his works by control.  The God that speaks true leadership and does not take 100% responsibility for our destination.  The God I know seeks our effort as well, he comes to us graciously by spirit and it is our choice to accept him or not.  Did the bible spoke of predestination? Of course it did, but in what context?

The term predestined was found in the bible several times in the epistles of Paul, here is what the scripture said:

Romans 8:28-30

And we know that all things work together for good to those who love God, to those who are called according to his purpose.  For whom he foreknew, he also predestined to be conformed to the image of his Son, that he might be the firstborn among many brethren.  Moreover whom he predestined, these he also called; whom he called, these he also justified; and whom he justified, these he also glorified.

So let me guess, now you are thinking, wow so Calvin is right? .O.M.G.  lol no, it got me at some point years ago too but it was since 2013 I was reading and it came to me this revelation, which was also confirmed by my knowledgeable Pastor and his Ministers; it is important that we understand that eternal life in God’s Kingdom is the birthright destiny of every single human species.  However, hold your guns!  This does not mean that every single solitary being will arise at the destiny God is desirous of.  What it means is that, God purpose was for man to be saved but because of our free will it is not so.  Predestination applied to the purpose God had originally determined for us when he decided to make creatures like us bearing his image.  He foreknew the weaknesses and strengths of each of us and so he knows what we may or may not choose and our choices alters our destination.  So let’s pree Judas Iscariott, when God said, ‘ And he who dips and break bread like me will betray me,’ he did not say in addition to that,  ‘he who dips will also hang himself and commit damnation unto himself.’  Judas had a responsibility to choose good or bad; he had the choice to seek repentance and turn from his evil ways or to whither in the spirit of condemnation.  Like wise Peter, he chose a path of repentance.  If angels could be elected by God, failed in their sinful ways and be dammed by God, what says us?  Calvin believed the elected cannot fail and would never be plucked out of God’s hands.  If Lucifer could be an elected angel, and then be thrown out of Heaven because of sin, what says us?  We all are equal in that we are unworthy of God’s grace, of his unmerited favour and so it is not by our works that we are saved but by God’s Mercy and his Grace.  Whom ever believes in him and lives a life of faithfulness and righteousness, obeying his commandments and living by his words, he by God’s grace will see the Kingdom of God and have eternal life.

For God so loved the world that he gave his only begotten son that whosoever believeso in him will not perish but have everlasting life.  John 3:16.

What does John 3:16 means to you, do you believe it justifies the Tulip doctrine or do u believe it justifies the point that WE ARE NOT PREDESTINED?


Had to break this short ad possible, stay tuned because the journey continues……. Dang! Dang! Dang! Dang!

Understanding the birth of Homosexuality


Homosexuality is a romantic attraction, sexual attraction or sexual behavior between members of the same sex or gender. It is categorized in two categories: lesbianism n gay-ism.
Sodomite is someone who have oral or anal sex wit another either of the opposite sex or same sex or wit animals, someone who practices sodomy.
The word sodomite was derived from the biblical town of Sodom, such as the story of Sodom and Gomorrah. Sodom is a distasteful term used in the bible and is strongly laden wit connotations of homosexuality.
Both sodomy & sodomite derived from the Canaanite city of Sodom, whose destruction along with Gomorrah is related in Genesis 19.

Some scriptural evidence regarding the sexual immorality of homosexuality maybe found in these books: Jude 1:5-8
Liviticus 18:22
Liviticus 20:13
I was stunned by this revelation regarding Sodomy. If sodomy is really what the dictionary defines it as and it is closely linked to homosexuality, then I believe the practices of oral sex that have become prevalent in society is the actual feeding ground that birth and arouse homosexuality even more due to the addiction that sodomy produces. If everything is spiritual, then the moment we engage sodomy and have become sodomites, then we have entertained also the spirits of homosexuality, so for those whom aren’t strong to not turn their eyes to the same sex for those same sodomite pleasures, then they Would fall in the pit of homosexuality.

Who are the canaanites? Why was there a curse? Who was Ham? Who was Canaan? What was Noah’s mistakes?

Join me for these answers soon.  Marriage &Oral Sex

Helping Hand

This is the post excerpt.

As I looked around, I realized people have lost sense of truth and faithfulness, No-one have the heart to help another.  How many of us still share what is called information?  How many of us share what’s called joy, finances, love,  in fact how many of us even save sacred time for our very friends?  Very few, if not, not many.  You see, the goal in life is to change the world by changing the mind of people.  What better control is that?  If we could transform the way we think, and be more like God, then life would be filled with much peace and joy.   Today, I beseech you, give a helping hand, lend a shoulder to cry on, in fact instead of buying yourself or your child that new toy or bracelet, purchase something nice for an homeless child or an adult.’